How To Exit
We find the Stoics writing frequently about endings. More specifically, we find them writing about how to end things. Our lives will see no shortage of experiences, jobs, or relationships that will reach their inevitable end, making the practice of exiting well a character-building one.
Book IV of Epictetus's Discourses And Selected Writings sees the slave-turned-philosopher encouraging us to celebrate well, but to leave a celebration gracefully once the time has come. "...go with thanks and reverence for what you were privileged for a time to see and hear," Epictetus advises, instead of clamoring for more than what was meant.
We see a similar quip from our philosopher-playwright Seneca, likening life to a play with the following: "...what matters is not how long the acting lasts, but how good it is. It is not important at which point you stop. Stop wherever you will—only make sure that you round it off with a good ending."
Roman emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius promotes the sentiment by asking that we "let [our] every action, word and thought be those of one who could depart from life at any moment." What's encouraged here, wholly and specifically, is conscientious living over ill-thought through conclusions. Our aim is to operate in such a manner that any action leaves little room for regret.
While Stoicism is the tie that binds Epictetus, Seneca, and Marcus Aurelius, it shouldn't be overlooked that a teacher, a playwright, and a person whom at one point was the most powerful man in the world each shared the same specific conviction: how you exit matters. Upholding this sentiment is what upholds our integrity as we progress from one phase to another. It's what allows us to evolve admirably.
Conscientiousness in our exits is not only a gift to others, but a gift to our future selves from whom we've spared the regret of leaving any chapter haphazardly. Put another way, get through and beyond anything by knowing how you want to come out of it.
Who do you want to be when this season concludes? That is how you exit.
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